Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Warm Water on a Plate, and Other Unanticipated Endings

Trevor says to me:  "You want anything from the fridge?"

I reply: "Rinsed berries... on a plate or a bowl.."

Trevor hears: "Warm water on a plate, horrible."

Don't worry, we were able to clear it up before anyone got hurt...

I was spoiled in Denmark.....  Everyday at work I accompanied all my co-workers into the corporate cafeteria for a free lunch where fresh, gourmet food was served everyday along with all you can eat salad bar, cheese, fruit, sometimes a dessert....spoiled.  Back in the US, I now have to remember to pack a lunch or bring some money for the cafe.  We do have a cafe that sells salads and sandwiches and some other weekly specials.  It unfortunately does not take credit card, and I rarely have cash.  So I usually keep my desk drawers packed with snacks to keep the blood sugar up.  Well I cleaned out my drawer before I left for Denmark and have yet to fill it up since I've been back.  I forgot lunch the other day and didn't have time to get out at lunch to get food or money.  So I kept running out to the car and scouring the floor and glove compartment for change.  I ate vending machine food for lunch..... cheez-its and twix (what's wrong with America?).  Then at 5pm, I realized I had $60 in my wallet. Way to torture yourself....

The other day--another day where I actually didn't have money or time and I didn't pack a lunch--I again was eating the vending machine for lunch.  I picked the pretzels..probably the most filling for $0.85.  .....Side note: while I was in Denmark the damn vending machine guy upped the prices on everything!! but I won't get started on that.....  I pick the pretzels...the spiral turns....and the pretzels get stuck...as my money is deposited in the vending machine deposit box...Damn. I only had enough money and enough time to get one package of pretzels and run to a meeting.  I ask my trusty co-worker if he can run into the break room, shake the vending machine, and throw the pretzels into the administration conference room.  He does.  I do not go hungry.

The other day I was filling up my coffee mug in the break room.  My coffee mug is leopard print with pink trim and a big pink "J" on it...(thanks Sally!)

My co-worker says:  "Nice coffee mug"

I say: "Thanks"

He says: "It reminds me of my wife's underwear...."

....I'm gonna walk away from that one....

Ever delete an entire spreadsheet's worth of work?  I spent 4 hours working on this spreadsheet....2 seconds deleting all of it without saving...then the remaining 4 hours trying to figure out how to get it back.  I never did.  It is lost for ever.  In summary I pretty much got NOTHING accomplished that day besides re-learning the importance of clicking on that little disk icon. Frustrated....

Home....kicked off the shoes...hanging on the couch, watching some TV with Trev.  Raising Hope is on.  The scene cuts to the mom on the toilet.  She's stuck in the toilet..yelling at her husband for leaving the toilet seat up...

Trevor (completely serious): "Is that why girls are always yelling at guys to put the toilet seat down?!"

Me: "Yea!"

Trevor: "Because you get stuck?!"

Me: "Well maybe not get stuck but you'd fall in."

Trevor: "You don't look?!?!  Why wouldn't you just look first?"

Me: "I guess you wouldn't think to look if it was always down..."

Trevor: "That's not a good answer."


Veal Parmigiana said...

Thank you. Your life should be syndicated!

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